here first. until we are there.

since i left you

early morning with maita and kuya. first day of school for most of the philippines. mothers watching their kids walk into school reassuring them that they would be there when they would turn back.

my mom loved to tell people about how on each of our first days of school, she’d be the one crying outside the school’s gate because we would never turn back. i’m sure i had my tantrum in my bedroom, the bathroom, the dining room, the car, but walking into school — i guess i just went in.

and now, it just makes me think.

patches of sunlight and gusts of wind.

———

i knew i was writing some sort of fragmentary subtext to some life or other and then fell in love with the idea that not only do our individual lives have subtextx, real or imagined, but that life itself is the subtext to something else. I decided that whatever the story was, I would, as life often seems to do, write the footnotes first and then construct the story later

-jane boully

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